Happy is one of the labels others stamp on me. I am a happy person. I identify with this label because, though life is certainly not perfect, I do have my secret formula for a happy life, even amidst chaos, pain, and the blunders that evidence my imperfection.

Happiness seems so elusive, especially when you’re a mom. The stress, the worries, the judgment and guilt cycles, the times of despair, and the times our kids break our heart seem to dampen such a beautiful journey.

I know it’s hard to believe in check-list happiness, yet, there are attitudes and practices that are common to those people who seem to grasp this gift, and do it consistently.

Happy moms practice mindfulness

Mindfulness is a mental state you can get to by focusing your awareness on the present moment. I used to think I didn’t have time for mindfulness. You know, with all we juggle as moms, we may think we can’t afford to add more items to our to-do-list, however, I have learned that just a few minutes of calmly providing acceptance, validation, and appreciation to myself – and all my emotions, is the not only a therapeutic and freeing habit, but also allows me to be a better steward of my time and be more productive.

Some ways I cultivate mindfulness is through prayer, meditation, yoga, alone time, and simply noticing my breath. And there’s also the mirror exercise I shared with you…

Think what would work for you to be more mindful, and take care of yourself, because your guaranteed source of happiness is within.

Happy moms are positive moms

One of the most empowering moments of my life happened in one of the darkest moments. As I saw myself as a single mom, feeling clueless, hopeless, worthless, I chose to take personal responsibility for how I reacted to the situation. Rather than looking at the circumstances or finding someone to blame, I looked within myself for solutions on how to move forward. Though painful, challenging, and unfair events may occur in your life, you can choose whether to become withdrawn, cantankerous, and bitter, or to have a vision, find meaning, and keep the faith. I always say that when you’re positive, you are powerful!

Happy moms are grateful moms

I admit sometimes it may seem difficult to express gratitude when you haven’t slept a full night – in years! Gratitude is a practice and the word practice implies that you do it imperfectly, over and over.

Horace, the philosopher, once said: “Whatever hour God has blessed you with, take it with a grateful hand.” And in motherhood, we have hours that test our sanity, but there is always something to be grateful for. And gratitude elevates our vibration, or in other words, it gives us energy, and it changes our perspective.

One of the gratitude practices I highly recommend is to keep a gratitude journal, where you record things, situations, and people you are grateful for each day. It’s easy to do, takes just a few minutes, and the results will impact your life dramatically – in a positive way.

Happy moms embrace other moms

I’m sure you are familiar with the so called “mommy wars.” Judgment of any kind brings unhappiness because all judgment really is self-judgment. There is so much beauty in diversity, and we can learn so much from each other.

I thought about this as I went to the baby aisle of my local Target with my family to buy the Stage 1 Gerber® Good Start® as a gift for a friend. We usually go shopping on Mondays and have so much fun together. Taylor Bare said he “loves the Target shopping carts, because they are smooth and noiseless,” and we all laughed out loud.

I breastfed exclusively, but I support formula feeding, too! Of course, whether you prefer formula feeding, or use it to supplement, or simply breastfeeding didn’t work out, I know that finding the best formula for your infant is difficult, especially if you’re a new mom.

Many moms ask me what I think, because they want to find formula that provides their child with all of the essential nutrients she needs, without being harsh on their tiny tummies. These gentle proteins provide comfort for your baby, keeping you and them happy!