It’s almost back-to-school again and that means that moms around the country are stocking up on school supplies, and in the digital age, whether your kid is in elementary, middle, or even high school, you must get ready to answer the dreaded question: “Can I have a cell phone?”
Deciding when your child is ready is a daunting event because having access to the world in the palm of your child’s hand can bring undesired evils like screen addiction, concerning content, and privacy issues, to name a few, but you also don’t want to deprive your not-so-little-one-anymore of an important social milestone any longer than necessary.
Because my daughters are teenagers as I write this (Elisha is 15 and Elyssa is14), I’ve actually thought about and researched this conundrum for long hours, trying to make the right choice and I’m going to break it down for you.
What age is right for a child to own a cellphone?
No one knows! Even pediatricians agree there’s no “right” age to give your child a phone. So, since there is no magic number, a better question to ask is “Can my child understand how to use the phone safely?”
To decide whether to get your child a phone, look for maturity rather than age. You’ll want to create a family cell phone contract and make sure that the child fully understands the many responsibilities of owning a phone and the implications of building a digital footprint.
How do I know if my child is ready for a phone?
Readiness to use a cellphone can be determined in very subtle ways, like a child’s ability to be polite when answering a phone or leaving a message, how well they take care of their belongings, or how effectively they manage their allowance, for example. You can look for signs that they are becoming more responsible and independent, like making their own lunch and being proficient at organizing their time.
The most important question to ask is: “Can I trust my child?”
Your child’s ability to respect the healthy boundaries you set and their willingness to communicate those boundaries to their own friends is essential. For example, if you tell your child “no group messaging” or “no messaging at night,” will they have the courage to tell their friends those activities are off-limits? Or will they stick to downloading the apps you’ve approved of? It’s good to remember that the child must respect their school’s mobile policy, if there is one, so becoming familiar with it is a great way to avoid unnecessary trouble.
When it comes to readiness, I believe it’s necessary to ask yourself whether you are ready for your child to have a phone. Communicating with your child using a smartphone is very convenient, but before you click “buy now,” you must be prepared for everything that could happen when the child gets a phone. This includes being non-reactive and non-judgmental, and having the energy and time to do damage control.
I always think it’s important to be ready as a mom to set a good example by demonstrating your own personal boundaries when it comes to mobile usage habits. As someone whose work involves being on my smartphone and other devices, I know this one can be a struggle, but it can be easier to ask your children to do something you’re already doing as many battles with teens come from a perceived double standard.
How much should I spend on my child’s cell phone?
Shopping for the right mobile phone for your child can be difficult! Even if your child never loses their belongings and you decide to get a heavy-duty case and full-coverage phone insurance, you may want to consider getting a used phone to minimize your investment. Makes sense, right?
But beware: most children are not quite fond of hand-me-downs, or of you deciding “you’ll be ready for a phone when I am due for an upgrade.” This is where pre-owned phones come in handy. It is a cost-effective way to test the waters, introduce your child to the device and teach them the powers and responsibilities of owning their very own phone.
You’ll be happy to know that Trademore offers a large variety of pre-owned devices with very competitive prices. I always say that someone’s trash is someone else’s treasure, but technology evolves so fast that most people upgrade their phones while they’re still like-new. Rather than having their electronics just sitting there and collecting dust, they could trade in their used smartphones to declutter and make money.
It’s very reassuring that all Trademore devices go through a 30-point functional and cosmetic inspection (for quality, reliability, and functionality) and receive a 100% inspection score, so your child will be proud to carry the device around their friends.
Buying a used smartphone on Trademore’s website is quite an easy process and you receive your order quickly, via free 2-day shipping.
This is such an exciting time for both mom and child and being positive, present, and proactive will assure that getting their first cell phone is a cherished memory rather than an unpleasant one.
Do you have any shopping tips for your child’s phone? Please share them with us in the comment area below.
Visit Trademore Buy to check out Trademore’s used phone offering, and make sure you follow them @trademoremobile on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook, and stay connected with #TrademoreCertified on your favorite social network.
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Founder of the Positive MOM® and creator of the S.T.O.R.Y. System: a blueprint to craft and share powerful stories that will transform your results and help others do the same. Dr. Elayna Fernández is a single mom of 4, an award-winning Storyteller, Story Strategist, and Student of Pain. She’s a bestselling author, internationally acclaimed keynote speaker, and 5x TEDx speaker. She has spoken at the United Nations, received the President’s Volunteer Lifetime Achievement Award, and was selected as one of the Top Impactful Leaders and a Woman of Influence by SUCCESS Magazine. Connect with Elayna at thepositivemom.com/ef and follow @thepositivemom. To receive a gift from Elayna, click HERE.
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eliza
Saturday 28th of July 2018
Very good points, useful and relevant. These are the facts that we really need to consider in granting not just phone but also other items that they wish for. Its boils down to "if that thing will be for their betterment".
daniele
Friday 27th of July 2018
Great idea thinking about before giving mobile phones to our kids. Good article on this topic.
Amy Dong
Thursday 26th of July 2018
It's definitely not as much the age as it is the maturity level of the child. Their ability to make and pursue good choices, even amidst social pressure, is really what fuels my decision with each kid :)
jeannine
Thursday 26th of July 2018
thank you for sharing tips. I think they are never ready but that is just me ;) My daughter *10 has one, but i keep an close eye - without her knowing, scary stuff out there
Cassie Tucker
Thursday 26th of July 2018
I agree, a used smartphone is probably the way to go. It saves the parent money in the long run and the child doesn't feel like they're getting your cast me downs or something that isn't good enough for you.