Since she came into this world after 13 hours of chaos and painful contractions, it’s been my job to keep Elisha safe. She seemed so fragile and yet, her big brown eyes were so alert. She was ready to take on the world, and so eager to learn.

And now it’s happening again. She’s getting ready to take on a new world and embark on a new adventure… but this time, on her own.

I have fed her, kept her warm, soothed her cries, and kissed her boo-boos. We’ve played her favorite games, watched her favorite shows, laughed at her silly jokes, and browsed through endless memes.

I’ve comforted her when someone has hurt her feelings and confronted anyone who dared make her cry. I’ve listened to her and supported her, and been her friend, her confidant, and her biggest fan.

And truth be told, I’m not worried about her. I’m worried about me. I can’t imagine waking up in a house without Elisha. There isn’t a human in this world that loves her like I do.

Elisha is ready… I’m not.

We’ve read Oh, The Places You’ll Go! so many times. I used my excited voice telling her “she has brains in her head and feet in her shoes” and “she’s too smart to go down any not-so-good street.” And I know it’s true.

I trust her.

Trust is an essential gift I can give my daughter. We’ve had the sex talk, the drugs talk, the alcohol talk, and the boys talk so many times and, at this time, she doesn’t need a lecture or a warning, she needs to know “wherever she flies, she’ll be best of the best” – not in a competitive kind of way or by comparison, I just want her to know I’m proud of her.

I don’t want to give her advice, become clingy, or helicopter our relationship to death.

My relationship with my dad taught me that when you trust someone to make good decisions, they are desirous to make good decisions. When I was a young girl, I was never scared of my dad and I knew he loved me unconditionally, but I was afraid to do anything that would break his heart or betray his trust in me.

I love that she’s independent.

I’ve striven to give Elisha both roots and wings though I thought the day she’d fly away and soar on her own was so far in the distance.

I want to make sure she is certain that I’m here when she is homesick, feels overwhelmed, or needs help. I won’t pressure her if she can’t call me everyday – even though I will be fighting against all of me because I will miss her so terribly and I’d want her to, but I want her to feel like she can call me as much as she feels. I don’t want our relationship to ever feel like an obligation, but a free exchange between two people who love and respect each other.

I know she’s strong.

And although “bang-ups and hang-ups can happen to her” she has the resilience and the tenacity to rise above anything. 

She reminds me of myself when I went off to college at only 15 years old, only I didn’t really know what I was walking towards because I was too focused on what I was escaping. 

Even though our homeschool years together have been relatively sheltered and she knows Mama Bear comes out when ever there’s any potential threat, I know Elisha is mighty and she’s equipped to fight any battles and come out triumphant “(98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed).”

She’s got a good foundation.

Elisha cooks, does laundry, makes her bed, and cleans up after herself. She knows how to sew, how to use a hammer, and how to work for what she wants.

If she stays as humble, grateful, and open-minded as she’s been, and keeps connected to her faith, her art, and her family, I know she’ll make her college years memorable, meaningful, and enjoyable. She’ll create lifelong relationships and use her loving heart, her compassion, her kindness, and her many talents to make a difference in others’ lives, and she’ll “face up to her problems, whatever they are.”

She’ll always be my child.

Elisha has a curious childlike spirit. She’s funny, fun, and embraces every moment as an adventure. She’ll continue to grow, learn, and evolve and, even if from afar, I’ll be happy to witness and be in awe of the woman she becomes.

We’ve already been through transitions and and changes, and college is the beginning of many others that will come. 

And just like I wished when she was in my belly… I just pray she’ll be healthy, happy, and safe… everything else just doesn’t matter as much.

So rather than giving her gadgets or furniture, or other items and stuff that people deem dorm necessities, I have partnered with the College Student First Aid Kit – Premium Plus and College Student First Aid Kit – Travel Kit to give my precious daughter the gift of The College Student First Aid Kit, which makes college life healthier, safer, and smarter.

The College Student First Aid Kit was created by Beth Palmer Stewart, mom and Nurse practitioner with over 25 years of experience working with children, adolescents and young adults. 

When Beth’s oldest daughter left for college in 2015, Beth wanted to send her to school with a first aid kit, but she realized that there were no first aid kits designed for the unique needs of a college student, and the ones available only consisted of low cost, generic items, which wasn’t enough.

A mom on a mission like you and I, Beth spent many months painstakingly researching the first aid needs of college students, and after comparing prices of medications and miscellaneous supplies with over 50 vendors, she created The College Student First Aid Kit.

The College Student First Aid Kit is comprehensive, organized, and affordable.With over 50 different medications, ointments, creams, drops, tools, and wound care items,The College Student First Aid Kit is like a mom-approved, dorm-sized, portable medicine cabinet that can help college students everywhere!

As I fight my mixed feelings, so irrational, yet so real, I know I need not be too worried because I’ve raised a wonderful daughter who stands firmly for what she knows is right even when it means standing alone, who chooses her own path even when it’s less traveled, and who chooses to be brave even when she’s afraid or she’s pushed way out of her comfort zone.

I’m mostly excited for the new chapter in her life, and I know she is and forever will be a light in my life, one of my greatest teachers, one of my biggest treasures, and a source of joy in my heart… nothing can ever change that.

I’m not losing my little girl…I’m gaining so much more! “Her mountain is waiting,” so it’s time she “gets on her way!”

I know I’ll also grow through this experience, because that’s what happens when your heart is torn in little pieces and you decide to be a student of pain. 

What is the most essential gift you can give your college-bound child? We all teach lessons, instill values, and build character, but a mixture of trust, freedom, safety, health, and unconditional love will be my choice.

[ela]